Saturday, January 26, 2013

Honesty.

I'm loving all the honesty that's been going on around the blogging world recently.  I feel like finally a collective of voices have said 'You know what? Being a mama is freakin' hard!' Mandy, Sash and Jess have all written about this recently, and each post is definitely worth a read.

For some reason in real life catch ups we seem to gloss over the bad bits and explain them away.  We put on a front instead of just being honest.  It's like you join the secrets club in the labour room, because god forbid you tell a woman who hasn't been through it yet what it is really like. Instead of learning from each other and sharing the struggle we pretend everything is awesome and as a result make others feel alone in their journey. 

I honestly think most of it comes down to the fact that the whole experience is so contradictory.  It is the most amazing, humbling and rewarding role; but at the same time is the most challenging, all-consuming experience that makes you give and give and give, even when you ran out of energy three days ago.  It's almost like we feel we can't admit it is hard without negating the good.

I only wish there was more of this honesty.  Where asking for help wasn't an admission of not-coping, where we could voice our complaints and have people understand you wouldn't change your situation for the world, you just need to vent.  Bring back the village mentality I say!

'No! Don't tell them I'm not always well dressed and looking cute!'

14 comments:

  1. I just went and read every post you linked up and thouroughly enjoyed each and every one!!! I love honestly, especially when it comes to motherhood because it's damn hard and no one ever gets credit. Here's a post I wrote on that same note:)

    http://bouffeebambini.blogspot.com/2012/11/on-parenting.html

    xoxoxo Hanna

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    1. Thanks Hanna, I'm off to check out your post. I loved your latest one as well. :)

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  2. I agree honesty and openness should be what bonds us not faking perfect lives.

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    1. Thanks for taking the time to comment. I actually had a bit of the 'need to censor guilt' after I hit publish. I wonder why we feel the need to not be completely honest.

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  3. Amen, on with the honesty!
    How much more powerful are words, when we use them that way!

    More power to you.
    Thanks for sharing.

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    1. Thanks itbritt. It feels good to know so many agree.

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  4. This is so great! and I'm so glad you posted it! It's so true i love knowing there are other mom's out there who don't live in a perfect little bubble where everything is happy go lucky 24-7 and that you are actually talking about it. Just today i vented with my friend about this! Being Momma is hard work and its perfectly okay to just be real about it. Makes it easier going through the struggles together! just in case we ever need those pushes.. and shoves. those uplifting words that only mother's can share with one another!

    So glad you decided to follow my blog ! thanks again!
    xoxo --jeneal from piecesofluv.com

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    1. I agree JeNeal. We want understanding not anyone to attempt to change our situation.

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  5. Yes, I love a bit of honesty. Being a mum is freaking hard, I struggle every day,even though I love my children to pieces.

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    1. We all struggle, and pretending you are not makes it even harder.

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  6. I think you are exactly right when you say it is the contradiction that makes it difficult to be honest.
    And the fact that when you look back, you only seem to remember the good things...and you forget how awful it felt to only get two hours of sleep and to be practically comatose on the floor while watching your baby do tummy time!

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    1. Yes! I wondered if people would understand what I was trying to say!

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  7. There definitely needs to be more honesty within the Motherhood... What happened to the sisterhood? We should be supporting each other through our successes AND our failures... Lordy do I know that we can all fall short sometimes and THAT is ok!

    Thanks for the link back to my post xx

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    1. Exactly. No worries about linking up. I had actually commented on yours but I think my comment disappeared (or maybe I got distracted and forgot to hit send?!).

      Hope things have improved for you.

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